We have had the stomach flu this week. And last week. It has moved through half of our family, which means the other half of us are still furiously handwashing and knocking on wood and crossing fingers and praying and all those other things you do to try and stay well. I’ve been rubbing Thieves oil on everyone and everything and have turned it into a verb: I’m Thievesing stuff.
Back in the day, I used to write blog posts all the time by the numbers. It’s probably time to bring that back.
Without further ado, I give you Stomach Flu, in numbers.
The number of:
People who have had the stomach flu: 3
Number of people waiting for the inevitable: 3Loads of laundry per day, on average: 4
Times we have changed sheets: 3
Times I have scrubbed toilets: 3
Times I have washed my hands: 11ty billion
Times a day I rub Thieves on people: 3
Days we have had the flu: 7
Times I have been thrown up on while sleeping: 5
Times I just kept sleeping: 3*
Baths taken per day, on average: 4
Times I have scrubbed floors with Thieves: 10
Times people threw up in the floor when there was a perfectly good bowl nearby: 3
Times people woke me up to say they had an “accidental poop” in bed: 1
Bottles of wine consumed: 3**
Times I continued eating my meal while someone was puking: 2
Times people “threw up out of their butts” (a Sawyer term) on the floor: 3
Days of school missed by kids: 3
Times I have cried: 0
Times I have laughed: at least 8
*I know. This is disgusting. It is one of those things you never envision doing and some parents may NEVER do it, but then sometime you’ll weigh the cost of waking up that baby or child (who threw up and promptly went back to sleep) and bathing everyone and changing all the clothes and the sheets and you just think: Nope.
**Between Rob and me. And possibly some friends. But not me alone!
Oy. It’s been a week. But then there have been good times as well. Stomach flu is a rite of passage you go through as a parent. You simply can hope it only happens ONCE. Or twice. You scrub everything and you hope it doesn’t happen again. (And that you don’t get it.) I like to find ways to laugh, like this post.
Despite being the sickest of everyone, Quin is crawling like a maniac and working on the official up on hands and knees crawl. How did this happen? And doesn’t Cooper look like a big little girl in this picture?? My kids are getting old all around me. When they’re not throwing up, that is. I hope your week is filled with less disinfectant!